Every time I see a time-lapse of an artwork it always amazes me how the outcome still resembles the starting idea the artist envisioned (e.g. "a horse"). But the creative liberty they took along the way creates something original instead. Personally, I was trapped with the approach that the most efficient way to do something would be to draw a straight line from the problem to the solution. I approached my career the same way, thinking that it will form a concrete steps (A-B-C).
But I am where I am today not through those carefully planned steps. My career took uneven path and curves that I couldn't have foreseen 5 years ago when I graduated. Many times, I'm not even sure how something would have turned out. It was an unreasonable and non-deterministic path. It's so foreign and probabilistic in nature that it's downright scary for somebody who originally wanted a calculated direct route.
Looking back at the artwork, perhaps that was all part of the messy middle in the process when the depiction of the horse was still unclear. My career was largely the result of taking chances outside the choices that are available to me. There were simply no options that I was willing to trade my flexibility for early in my career. But with more lines drawn, it slowly forms a boundary/shape that the artist is now comfortable with to guide the vision they have in mind to completion.
Stability and predictability are reassuring that they're the foundation of the peaceful society we live in now. But humanity only achieved it through a series of uncertainties and emerging choices.
Let this be a reminder for myself.